Thoughts on being thrown through a window.
You know, once someone’s head is about to go through a window, they get very introspective. They like to enjoy those last couple moments to think about how they ended up there, to see if they can figure out how they woke up like every other day, ate breakfast like every other morning, got dressed and headed out of the house yet somehow ended up with two bodybuilders throwing them through a plate glass window.
If they don’t get their throat cut with a shard on the way through, they won’t be thinking at all. Their brain will go into full on flight mode (no fighting here) adrenaline will dump into their blood and their body will do it’s best to keep the pain to a minimum. If, after a few seconds, they have had time to figure out how they ended up on that floor, blood pouring from their forehead, shards of glass sticking from their eyelids and lips, they will offer me the money that is owed to me and we’ll have no more unpleasantness.
After someone has been thrown through a window by me and lived, they get a little more philosophical. I appreciate this aspect of the mind’s way of dealing with trauma. One person, after dealing with me and settling his debts, even took the time to write me a letter asking me how I can possibly find enough windows to throw people through. I replied to him, very cordially I might add, that I once had a window maker who owed me money and we worked out a deal. He pays me in fresh windows. It’s a strain on his finances but less of a strain on his face. I think he respects that and appreciates it.
People ask me, “Why do you do it man? Why? Why not just put a gun in their face, or kidnap their kids, or break their arms? Why go through the trouble?” I mean, come on. Guns? Kidnapping? Arm breaking? Boooooring. I’d like to think that there is room for innovation and creativity in any line of work, but especially in intimidation and debt collection. And besides, just because they couldn’t pay their hospital bills, doesn’t mean they aren’t entitled to first class customer service on my end does it?
Does it?
The answer is no. No it does not.
Reaaal smooth. “I think he respects that and appreciates it.”